|Appreciating the parents we have
||[Dec. 24th, 2009|12:07 am]
I've been depressed a lot lately. I don't talk to many people I know, I don't work, and I don't feel like I contribute much. I'd get a job, but, goddamnit it's so hard. I hate this damn economy I graduated in. But luckily my parents pay for my community college (Thank god I also have the millenium scholarship. Cheaper tuition FTW). My mom works a job that doesn't pay much, and my dad works a job in the morning.
My dad used to have two jobs, but he got fired in his later shift because of his status. I've enjoyed honestly, the freer time he has. He's no long as tired, and I can talk to him a lot more. I've learned to cook a lot. But in this winter, things look grim. My dad doesn't know if they're going to lay him off from his job and my mom never knows either.
Lately, mortality's hit me as a stronger issue lately. It just has hit me all of a sudden, but, my parents are getting older. They're not too old, but next year they'll be 47. I know this. Technically they can retire in Mexico with my mom's inheritance, but, I want to take them in when they're older so they don't have to worry about expenses. Both of my parents are diabetics, and my dad's taking care of himself a lot more. My mom takes insulin and she's smoked for years. Always tries to quit, and she's moved unto sunflower seeds. She's taken her health more seriously lately. I know for some Americans who aren't family-centric their parents can be a wandering issue. And for a long time, for me, it was. I always wanted to be with my friends more.
I always wanted to live closer to my friends and get away from my family. And to this day I still want to go out of state for college. I've remembered the things that they've done. I started bawling like a baby. They've worked two jobs for a long time. Mom worked two jobs and always had a babysitter for us when she could to make sure we could live comfortably without relying on government assistance. For the past few years, I've had nice Christmases. Sure, she was stingy, but we always had food on the table, never had the electricity cut out on us, etc. My dad never drank after my sis was 2 until my sister started getting beaten by her ex-boyfriend but stopped because my sis didn't want him to suffer because of her. They're both very responsible with their finances and only spend when we need it.
Whenever a relative doesn't want to take care of a puppy they want, we take them in. My parents let our pets stink up the place and we don't chain our pets outside. When I'm depressed, my parents help me out. My dad's the kind of guy who gives the shirt off his back to someone who needs it more than himself. My parents take care of my sis, her two kids, and myself even if they don't need to. And I cry like a baby, because they've done so much for me than I've done for them. I was bitter towards my mother because of things that happened to me growing up, cursed them out for a long time, always whined that we were poor, etc. Growing up I always envied people who've had more than us. And I went to Bonanza High School, a school quite a few miles away from me, which cost a lot of gasoline, just so I could go to a school where I felt normal; so I wasn't suicidal from the harassment that I used to get at Charles I. West Middle School.
and I remember the stories of my parents growing up in Mexico. Mom, at the age of 9, left her home to live with her brothers and sisters (Who weren't much older)in an apartment in Mexico City to go to school or else she would've been left with a 3rd grade education. My dad lost his mother at the age of 15. Both of my parents had womanizer dads. Both of them have been working since a young age. They both went to college for free and by the time they were 22 they'd purchased their own apartment in Mexico. My sis was born around this time, and she had pus in her body when she was 2.
She could've died, but my dad begged his brother to lend her some money so they'd operate her in a private hospital. After this, both of my parents left for the United States where they worked odd jobs here and there until I was born. Since they'd worked many hours since I was little, I was always bitter about my parents not being there very often, but, whenever they could they'd take us out. And for years I forgot this. And yet so many people I know never grew up in a two parent household, and didn't have parents as loving as mine. And so many out there have parents who never gave up so much for them. I regret not realizing I have great parents until now. So many people throw in the towel but they never do. And for that, I am grateful.